Finding Friends

As a Christian, you already have a perfect friendship. You have a friend in Jesus Christ. God’s Son, Jesus, has chosen you to be His friend. Just as with His disciples, Jesus speaks of you as His friend: “You are My friends… I have called you friends” (John 15:14-15). With Jesus as your friend, you really don’t need anyone else.

But God also provides other people with whom you can and should have friendships. Women you meet at church are a natural starting point. And what about making friends with those in your community? Recently I spoke at a women’s conference in California, and while I was there, I spent time visiting with a former next-door neighbor I hadn’t seen in several decades. Amazingly, we picked up right where we had left off, before we both moved away those many years ago!

There are two other sources of friends that we often forget about. One is your parents. There is nothing weird about having your mom and dad as best friends. They are God’s gift to you. No one loves you more, or cares for your best interests more, than your parents. Make it a goal – and put in the time, effort, and money – to develop a deeper level of friendship with your parents. Work on it today and every day. And in later years you will be blessed and so glad you did.

Two, you also have friends in your brothers and sisters. As a child, you probably thought, Friends with my goofy brother? No way!  or Friends with my pesky little sister? You’ve got to be kidding! But in truth, your friends throughout life come and go. You may stay in touch with some, but most of your friends will move on.

But your family is just that – your family. They will always be there, especially if you work at building and maintaining friendships with them. And that goofy brother of yours is all grown up and not so goofy anymore. And that pesky little sister is a woman with a family of her own. So pray for your family members, and your nieces and nephews!  Make an effort to stay tight and close to your family.

A Prayer to Pray: Lord, help me to always see you as the most important friendship in my life. And help me to seek and develop relationships that are healthy, godly, and meaningful to both my life and theirs.

Please read my book A Woman’s Guide to Making Right Choices for more insight and encouragement for becoming a woman after God’s own heart.


  1. Ruth Anne Hohnecker says:

    i have been thankful for your devotions and have been receiving them since I saw you at a Ladies’ Conference at Hawthorne Gospel in New Jersey. Thank you for sharing your heart as well as insights from the Holy Spirit. I was excited when I saw the caption today- finding friends- because I have felt alone recently. Though the point about family being friends is a wonderful point- I lost my only sibling when I was 30 to a terminal illness. Times of stress have been lonely, especially when we had several losses with parents and loved ones, and when my husband had cancer that spread. I was alone with him in the hospital as he received treatments. Not everyone has family to be friends with for life. I am praying I can be a friend to my children and that my children can support each other, so, thank you for pointing out that siblings and parents can be friends. But, there are those of us who do not have those siblings to form friendships with and to have for life.

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